[Saitou just stares at that message for a long time.
Even if he should feel vindicated - he can't help but feel horrible about this, at the same time. That Hijikata, of all people, came back to him and admitted to being wrong.
It's hard to think about Hijikata being humbled like that, when Hijikata is the one whose conviction is what keeps giving the rest of them the strength to hold their heads up high. Or should be, at least.]
It is behind us now, sir.
[Because he doesn't know what else to say. He can't say that it's not a big deal, to forget about it - that's a lie and that's not right. It's not as though all his anger about this didn't happen, and that this wasn't important - very important.
But the last thing on his mind right now is "I told you so."]
but, then again, he's not sure what he would say to anything right now. and there's nothing that could have been said differently to make him feel relieved or better or worse. the only solace he finds is that he sent the message to Saitou in the first place.
maybe right now it's just driving him crazy and he can't see beyond it. he knows that this probably wouldn't have changed much of anything even if he had told the other. in fact, he doubts much will change in way of his own dealings with Kazama. but, that doesn't matter—and this mistake combined with that mistake are just difficult for him.
this won't solve much, not where Hijikata needs it to ( because, what he needs is someone he can admit what he doesn't want to admit to himself in the first place ). but, he hopes, at the very least, he can stop being a child long enough to try and mend a bridge that he never should have thought was fine to try sabotaging in the first place. Saitou's too important, now. and he can't change that.
but, with nothing to say, he leaves it at that, giving a small sigh and dropping the watch once again covered in blood to the desk before he leaves the room.
that's been breached. not fixed, but he'll work on that after he deals with the rest of today. ]
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Even if he should feel vindicated - he can't help but feel horrible about this, at the same time. That Hijikata, of all people, came back to him and admitted to being wrong.
It's hard to think about Hijikata being humbled like that, when Hijikata is the one whose conviction is what keeps giving the rest of them the strength to hold their heads up high. Or should be, at least.]
It is behind us now, sir.
[Because he doesn't know what else to say. He can't say that it's not a big deal, to forget about it - that's a lie and that's not right. It's not as though all his anger about this didn't happen, and that this wasn't important - very important.
But the last thing on his mind right now is "I told you so."]
not here
but, then again, he's not sure what he would say to anything right now. and there's nothing that could have been said differently to make him feel relieved or better or worse. the only solace he finds is that he sent the message to Saitou in the first place.
maybe right now it's just driving him crazy and he can't see beyond it. he knows that this probably wouldn't have changed much of anything even if he had told the other. in fact, he doubts much will change in way of his own dealings with Kazama. but, that doesn't matter—and this mistake combined with that mistake are just difficult for him.
this won't solve much, not where Hijikata needs it to ( because, what he needs is someone he can admit what he doesn't want to admit to himself in the first place ). but, he hopes, at the very least, he can stop being a child long enough to try and mend a bridge that he never should have thought was fine to try sabotaging in the first place. Saitou's too important, now. and he can't change that.
but, with nothing to say, he leaves it at that, giving a small sigh and dropping the watch once again covered in blood to the desk before he leaves the room.
that's been breached. not fixed, but he'll work on that after he deals with the rest of today. ]